Friday, April 27, 2012

Mom-spirations- Patricia

Patricia P.

Fun Fact: One of my first words was "Patty". That is how much I love my cousin Patty. She is 28 days older than I am and I admire the heck out of her. She is super modest so I am going to brag about her a little bit. She has her BA from UCLA, her MA from HARVARD, and her PhD from UCLA. So that's Dr. Patricia to you! That's right people. She is now a university professor. She is impressive right? She is also sweet, and kind and fun and loving and one of my best friends. Patricia is also Mommy to 2 equally amazing little boys, an almost 3 year old and almost 1 year old. I asked my awesome cousin some questions about motherhood....

Will you have more kids? 
Not if I get my way.

What are your feelings on helicopter parents?
They can be annoying but ultimately they are their kids advocates.

Are you a Nap Nazi? Stickler for routine and schedules? 
Yes, to the extent possible. My boys are cranky when they don't get their naps

Most surprising thing about parenthood? 
The guilt that never goes away when I have to leave the boys on the days I go to work.

Is your partner the type of parent you imagined them to be? 
Better! So patient and a softy like I knew he would be.

Where did your boys names come from?

We wanted our boys to have names that reflected their cultural heritage and I swore I did not want biblical names. Jovan found Matias in a name book (although I swear I pointed it out to him before that) and we found out it is a form of Matthew and means "Gift from God." Go figure. Because we considered M a blessing we decided to go with Matias for his first name and his dad's name as a middle name. Even up until we had to fill out the paperwork there was a chance that he would be Jovan Matias. I did not want a junior. We narrowed down a few names that we liked for Andres, which means manly, warrior. We've always liked Joaquin, which means "God will establish a son", and is also my great-grandfather's name, so we went with that for the middle name. [Again, can't escape the religion.] The OCD person in me liked that my boys would both have 6-letter first names and they both ended with S. They also have the same middle initial and of course, last name. Our boys last name is my last name and their dad's last name hyphenated. I figured that they are half mine too so they should have my name as well. Additionally, because I only have sisters, It was important for me to carry that legacy to the next generation.

Where did your kids nicknames come from? 
Chiquito is short for Chiquito Bonito. M was so small (5 lbs 13 oz) so I called him my chiquito bonito. I call A my munchkin because he is so soft, squishy and my butterball. M calls him "Des" because he can't always pronounce his full name.

What’s the best parenting advice you have ever received? 
Sleep when the baby sleeps. This gets much harder when you have two.

What is your favorite baby gear? 
BOPPY! (Thanks Tia Mercy and Tio Felix!) It is so versatile and I use it ALL THE TIME especially b/c I use it during breastfeeding. We have also used it at bed time to keep the baby's head elevated when he is sick. We also use it to put behind A's back when he is sitting because he likes to throw himself back recklessly. It is also good for tummy time when your child is just starting to learn to get off the ground.

 What is your parenting philosophy?
Kids need structure AND space to have fun. They also need lots of hugs and affection (or maybe that is for me). I think it is also important to role model good behavior. 

When you were 16 did you imagine your life would end up where it is now? 
NO! 16 seems so long ago. I was too busy worried about grades at that time to think about where I would end up.

 What is the ideal Mother’s Day gift? 
Sleep. (amen sister!)

How did having kids change your marriage/ relationship?
The partnership became stronger. I realized how much effort it takes to raise kids and it is much easier with two folks in the home. We also have less sex (and sleep) but when we do get a chance we make it count. ;)

 How do you keep the romance alive in your relationship after kids?
 Redefining and adapting to a new version of romance. Before when roses would have been romantic now I think that money is better spent on the boys. When I get an unexpected kiss or gesture, that is enough for me. We have tried the date thing and we do have fun but I find myself thinking about the boys the whole time. Sort of defeats the purpose.

What is your favorite thing to do with your kids? 
Kiss them.

What was your favorite book from childhood?
Brown bear, brown bear.

How do you deal with discipline in your house? 
It depends on the offense. hitting = go straight to your room; not listening = warning until M ends up in his room for continuing to not listen. 

What is your favorite meal to make for your kids? 

Are you more relaxed with your second/third/fourth child?

Where do you go first when you need parenting advice?
Carissa  (my sister and Patricia's younger cousin)

Who is your Mom-spiration? 
My mom and Nana. My mom has been so generous and helpful during both my pregnancies AND post-partum. I always think about how in the heck Nana was able to do it with so many kids (Our Nana has 9 kids!)- she deserves a medal!

I asked Patricia's husband Jovan to say a few words about Patricia as a Mother....

"My wife Patricia is a wonderful, nurturing mother to our two beautiful boys. She is gentle, strong and always teaching right from wrong. Our boys are so blessed to have her as a mom. She has a very busy schedule but somehow still manages to do it all. Simply put best, she is the queen of the house."

I also asked Patricia's Mom, (my beautiful Tia) Angie to share a few thoughts on Patricia the Mom...

"Patricia, if your boy's could express to you what you mean to them they would say:
You are the best Mom ever. You take great care of us, you love us unconditionally, there isn't anything you wouldn't do for us. We love you with all our hearts. We are truly blessed to have you as our Mom.

Patricia, you never cease to amaze me, with your career, a wife and now a mother of two beautiful boys. You do it all!! I want to say to you...Thank You for making my dreams come true and making me a Grandmother! I will always love you forever!!!!"

Comadre, even before you became a Mother, I knew you would be amazing at it. That is why when it came time to choose who I wanted to co-mother The Phi with, I had no hesitation in choosing you. Happy Mother's Day!


  1. I am glad you chose Patty as one of your mom-spirations. I am so proud and honored to have been her friend since the 7th grade! I am happy for her success in her career and like you, knew she would be a wonderful mother!

  2. Anonymous11:17 AM

    Thanks, Comadre! Thank you Jovan and mom! I feel so fortunate to have so many generous, supportive and beautiful people around me. <3

  3. I feel out of the loop. I thought Patty just had one son! Oops. Maybe this means I don't spend enough time on FB.

    Patty, congrats on the two beautiful boys. I'm sure you're getting them on the path to college already. Miss you!

  4. I sincerely love that you're doing this.

    I find it so interesting that everyone names the boppy as the best baby gear. I thought that it was just me! Seriously, that pillow rocks!

    1. I still use ours as a pillow when watching TV


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