Last summer I had the big period/sex talk with Phi. She had just turned 11 and since I was 11 when I started mine I figured I better prepare her. I checked out books from the library and read some on-line articles about how to give "the talk". Then on one weekend afternoon, we camped out on my bed with books and pamphlets.
We talked for about 2 hours. I gave her a straight forward talk about puberty and even the dreaded sex talk. She had a lot of questions for me. I felt like it went well and she has continued to ask questions.
Since then it's been like a waiting game. I feel like I am just staring at her, just waiting for her to start her period. When she get a little moody I think, "It's gonna happen any day now". And then she goes back to her normal pre-teen self and nothing.
On April 1st, she got me good. I heard her yelling for me from the bathroom and as I ran into the hallway she says, "Mom I started by period!" and as I opened the door she yells "April fools!". She got me so good.
Recently I bought these cool new "teen" pads and gave her a little pouch to keep a few in her backpack. A few of her friends have already started and really I am shocked she hasn't yet.
I don't know why I am so anxious about this milestone. Phi is not even as anxious about it as I am. I think it's because in my mind when this starts she will immediately turn into a stereotypical teenager. I feel like it will be the beginning of a big change in our relationship. The change that I am so scared of. Where she becomes more distant. Where she stops talking to me. Where she feels like she knows better than me. I am doing what I can to talk to her and more importantly listen to her as often as she lets me. She tells me about her day everyday. And we write to each other in a private journal back and forth. I just want to know what I can do to keep the conversation going even as she becomes a teenager.
Any day now.