Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Damn this Chicana/Catholic/Middle Class Guilt

So yesterday I took the plunge and headed over to the Sage Spa. For Christmas PR Dad was very brave and bought me a nice gift card and instead of just letting it sit there all year, like I would normally do I used some of it yesterday. I booked myself the Winter Spa Indulgence Package. Ohhh sounds nice huh? It included a manicure or pedicure with a 50 minute facial or 50 minute Swedish massage. Since my cuticles were in baaadd shape I went for the manicure first. I entered the spa checked in at the front desk. I was given a red key and escorted to the women's room. I was shown my locker where I could keep my purse and clothes and was given a super soft robe and some ugly plastic slipper. Think old school adidas soccer sandals. So I quickly changed and sat in a little waiting area with big cushy chairs, fruit bowls, magazines and chilled spring water.The nail technician came out and took me into a pretty big bright room. It was just her and I and, she spoke English and we had a nice conversation and she made my hands look pretty and soft. Then I was whisked up an elevator to a dimly light floor with different doors. I was ushered into a candle lit room and instructed to dis-robe and and lay on the massage table. My therapist left the room and I did as I was told and they came back in. The massage therapist then squeezed some oil onto my back and pulled down the covers and of course asked about the tattoo on my back. I have an "R" on my lower back (yes I have a tramp stamp, whatever) As usual I lied and said that my grandmothers names began with "R"'s.

Then it was quite and as I was beginning to relax and my mind began to wander. The comment about the tattoo and my grandmothers, made me think of, well my grandmothers. Then I got to thinking how my grandmothers never have had such luxuries like a spa massage. Then I got to thinking about how I was here to relax from my stressful life. But then I got to thinking about my desk job where I tap on keys and yap on the phone for 7 hours a day. And the 1 kid that I have to take care of. THEN I got to thinking of my Nana waiting tables in Arizona, and my Grandma Rachel picking cotton in the desert. And then the about the 9 kids Nana took care of and the 6 kids my Grandma Rachel took care of. I felt like such a spoiled douche bag. Then the music changed to a Native American pan flute song and I envisioned a Native American woman washing clothes against rocks at a river. And then I felt like an even bigger douche bag. Then the next thing I knew my 50 minutes were up.

So next time I am going to tell the truth about my tattoo and take my i-pod so maybe next time I can actually relax.

Oh and cucumber water really does taste like cucumber and is really good.

And steam rooms rock.


  1. I love this post. I have had some of the same guilt feelings, but quickly got over them. After Christmas I took my wife and son to a resort in La Jolla that my parents could have never afforded. And we did the Spa and Steam Room. Life is for living in the present and I hope that my son gets to live a better life than I have so far. Saludos from Camarillo.

  2. Anonymous8:09 AM

    This is a great county, are parents came here for a better life for them and their children.But remember our grandparents and our parents had no education pass the fifth grade.So they work hard and long at a job that has no future of them ever owning a home, our parents put all of their sweat and tears for a better life for all who will join this family in the future, they did it for Family, just for Family, and if you ask them they would gladly do it again.
    So educate yourself and your kids, teach them to respect themselves and others, and you go to the resort and indulge yourself,your grandparents and parents have worked hard for you to do that.

  3. Anonymous11:04 AM

    Well said Pops! PR Mom, I hope you enjoy your next installment of luxury. Now that I think about it, I need a mani/pedi and massage. Maybe I'll go this weekend and think about how I should be spending time with my boys! Lots of love--JVS

  4. You can put a spin on that guilt and turn it into an appreciation for the life you have. It sounds like you were there... all but feeling sad that you are able to experience luxuries that other people (who you love) were not.

    In contrast, I saw the ugliest thing on tv the other night. I was flipping through the channels and stopped to watch some reality/documentary sort of thing (I don't know what it was called or what channel it was on and I only watched it for about two minutes.)

    There was a mother and a daughter. The mother was grandma aged and the daughter was middle aged. The mother said that she was hesitant to fly out to visit her daughter because her daughter is always on the go and she feels like when she visits she just sits in the house alone. The daughter said, "She doesn't know anything. My father treated her like a princess. She never had to work. She had five kids and all she did was say at home. And THAT'S what she did." as if staying home with five kids was worthless and was not work. Then, she said to her mother, "I want to work all the time because working all the time means that I can have nice things that I want... like a big house and big trips..." and her mother looked at her, totally disgusted and said, "want less."

    I found this so disgusting because here was a completely greedy, crazy lady who had absolutely no respect for what the people before her did and they way they lived.

    And now I feel sour.


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