We have not had any problems with school since The Phi started. She has always loved going, had lots to share and talked about her friends. So when the scene went down yesterday morning I was caught completely off guard. We pulled into the parking lot and I turned the car off. As I went to reach for the handle to open the door, The Phi completely freaked out. She started crying, telling me that she didn't want to go to school. She told me she wanted it to be Saturday and not a school day. I tried to calm her down and find out why she didn't want to go to school. I was so shocked by her actions. She told me that the kids made her sad and she didn't want to go in there with them. She told me that they didn't like her and didn't want to play with her.
My heart broke into a gazillion pieces for my little girl. So we drive off and she came to work with me.
I know this was not the right thing to do. I know that I should have made her go to school. But the thought of her having to play by herself because the other kids refused to play with her was too much for me. I had a feeling that something like this was going on. Recently when I would drop her off she would just stand around and not go up to anyone. She would eventually play with a toy alone or read a book. I thought it was strange and talked to PR Dad about it and he just said that maybe she just needed some time in the morning to get adjusted to being at school.
We talked with her throughout the day about it. I asked her if she was mean to the kids, or maybe whiny at school. She said she wasn't and the teacher hasn't said anything about her attitude to me. I told The Phi that she should just go up to someone and ask if they want to play and she said she would.
This morning I took her to school. As I signed her in she walked over to a little girl coloring at a table and very very meekly she asked, "Can I play with you?". It was so sad. The little girl barely looked up so I stepped in. I know I know. I asked the little girl where the color pages were and she jumped up and went to grab one for The Phi. Then The Phi sat down and a couple more kids joined in. She just sat there and I had to push the crayons towards her.
I left her classroom and cried on my way to the car. It hurts so fucking much to watch your kids struggle.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Pre-School Went Emo
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I would have done the same thing. There are plenty of years for life lessons, they need to feel love and be happy when they are little.ReplyDelete
Aw, man. I feel for The Phi. Give her a hug for me!ReplyDelete
Awww, that hurts.ReplyDelete
Zoe had the same issue, and I wanted to intervene, but waited to see if the kids could work it out on their own. They did. I felt the same way you, did, however.
Hey love! That just about broke my heart. I am sorry she's having such a hard time. Maybe you could cheat a bit by sending her to school with cupcakes for the class or the like? When all else fails, there's sugar.ReplyDelete
By the way, this is my first comment on a blog here. I'm new. So..Hi! :)
Kids will be kids, but I know the Phi's hurt is true. This week the Phi next week one of the other kids.But I like TattooedBunIntheOven's idea about the cupcakes.ReplyDelete
Things will workout, Love
I overheard another kid in Oscar's school tell their mother that "So and so said Oscar is a baby". The girl's mother handled it well saying, "no one that comes to school is a baby, you are all big kids" but it still broke my heart. He is the youngest in the class and I had been worried about how he would fit in.ReplyDelete
I had a talk with the teacher and she said that she would keep an eye on it, but that the kid that called him a baby had an older cousin and that was where the attitude was coming from, not from anything that Oscar was doing or how the kids were treating him.
You might want to say something to the teachers just so that they can help the Phi connect with the other kids. It might not be as bad as you are imagining. The other thing you could do (if you can spare the time from work) is maybe volunteer in the class for a day...you could get a feel for how stuff is going and I bet Phi would be thrilled!
or you could just smack the shit out of those other kids! sorry...i'm clearly not a mom yet!ReplyDelete
aww i am sorry to hear that. I would have cried to. I hate to see anyone get their feelings hurt. Maybe The Phi could have some neighbor kids come over to play?ReplyDelete
Aw. Poor Phi. I hope things are getting better. Does she get a Christmas vacation from school too?ReplyDelete