Tuesday, June 17, 2008

so now that its out there...

I HATE where we live. This move was suppose to be temporary and now it looks like we may be stuck here for a long long long time. Here let me give you an idea of where we live. Have you ever seen the show My Name is Earl? Well that opening scene, and a lot of the outdoor city scenes, yea they were filmed here. Yes I live in the My Name is Earl town. PR Dad bought this house almost 5 years ago now because it was something we could afford. And the irony, we have an adjustable rate mortgage, so now we are paying just as much as we would have been paying if we bought something in a better location 5 years ago. I hate how far away it is from our families, and I hate how we are stuck. I don't feel safe going most places without PR Dad, so we spend a lot of time in the house. A house that now needs a lot of work and possibly an exterminator. There is no one here to watch The Phi, so there are a lot of little things that I can't do. No gym, no manicure, no hair cuts, no shopping trips. Just work and the occasional library trip. This has been going on for almost 5 years. 5 years of no friends and an almost no social life. I have become overweight, dumb downed, and depressed. I can't raise my kid the way I would want to. We should be able to take walks, have play dates, play at the beach, learn to swim. Instead she rides her tricycle in a small circle on the back patio. While I watch her like a hawk so she doesn't fall into the swamp of a pool. I love my husband and I love my daughter, but I feel like we have been trapped in a bubble together for years. It is getting to the point where PR Dad and I are taking each other for granted and The Phi is becoming more and more socially awkward. But really what can we do. The housing market is shit. There is a 2 year old 4 bedroom house next door to us being sold for $174,500. We bought our house for more than that 5 years ago. How bad is a foreclosure on your credit record, because I really want to just pack our shit and leave. Start over again back home. Even live in an apartment. I want to go back to school, finish my damn degree. Get back into academia and live up to know what I am capable of. To be able to give The Phi a better life than here.


  1. Anonymous10:34 AM

    Foreclosure is bad. Definitely not an option to take by choice.

    I imagine it's difficult, and no doubt frustrating. I'm sure that some creative thinking, and some discussions (nothing will be solved in 1 discussion), the three of you will figure out what's best.

    Whatever you do, stay away from foreclosure!

  2. Anonymous12:00 PM

    rent it out and if it means making up the difference it's okay....

  3. I don't know. What you are describing sounds horrible, and it is your life that we are talking about - is that worth being stuck somewhere that you are so miserable? At least if you went into foreclosure now you would be among hundreds of thousands of other people and it wouldn't stand out so much.

    They keep talking about the market turning around...maybe you could hold out for a year to see if you could sell it? Especially look at the programs they are coming out with to help people with ARMs, and you are in one of the hardest hit areas, you might get more incentives/help than most people.

    Maybe talk to a lawyer to see what would happen to you after a foreclosure...ufta, good luck.

  4. Anonymous8:08 AM

    Mija, we will support whatever decision you make. You know that we are here for you. We love you very much and we want you to be happy. pn

  5. Anonymous12:34 PM

    Call your local City Housing Authority department to find out what they will pay you for allowing them to rent out your house. They usually pay maximum market/rental value. You can then pay the monthly difference. They will put you on a yearly contract, so you will be able to count on receiving you money on a regular basis. Dealing with renters suck!! I am sure the difference will be less then what you are paying know? Just a little rental property trick.

    I worked for a mortgage company while in Grad school, and believe me, you do not want to mess with your credit!! It will eventually come back to haunt you. Remember, we live in a credit driven society. They check your credit for everything!!

    Good Luck!!!

    A.K.A. “BH”

  6. You've been given some good advice here. Sorry that you're feeling so hopeless. It's rough for alot of people right now. Just think, when you are out of there you will look back on your time together and I'm sure you will only remember the good times, the closeness you had, the simplicity of your life. I used to live in a trailer and believe me, I felt the way you do. "we'll never be able to get out of here...we'll never be able to afford anything else...I hate this place...I hate my life..." and then God opened up a door for us and we were able to get our house. And to this day I will think back at that little trailer and all the good times we had, how simple and easy our life was (we only had three kids then). It never fails to make me smile.

    OH...and I was never able to open up that doc you sent me. I'm so sorry, I don't want you to think I just shined it on...but I'm kinda a computer retard.

  7. Anonymous11:38 PM

    I think the only way people will want to buy into Banning is if they legalize prostitution and gambling. Foogetaboutit.


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